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Popo
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« Reply #80 on: October 30, 2008, 04:35:04 PM » |
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Yay! That sounds like a pretty good response.  I'll take some time and make one then. (I just need to cook up some really good lineart first~) Here's something new--another work in progress. Miki Kaoru, from Revolutionary Girl Utena. http://popo-licious.deviantart.com/art/RGU-Miki-Kaoru-WIP-102215277 |
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Sardine
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« Reply #81 on: October 30, 2008, 07:14:15 PM » |
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You're getting better. Watch your cylinder shapes when in perspective (notably the arm/forearm that is closest to the camera) and the weird folding of the off hand.
Notes on two things: Figure out which stage of the flesh she is in. Right now, she is in-between two actions. (Meaning that the character is not in full motion, nor is she in preparation) That's not a good thing. Determine if she is about to flesh or doing the flesh, it'll make the piece a lot stronger as far as motion. Right now the ambiguity is throwing the audience off balance. If that is your intention, there are better, other ways of doing that.
Second note: figure out how she is gripping the epee. If it is a French (straight) grip versus a pistol grip, note that the way the arm aligns with the bellguard will be slightly different.
[edit] When you figure out what she's doing at what stage, do your bloody research. All lunging fencing have their far arms down, or out when doing either a lunge or a flesh. Basic stance for foil (and some epee) is weapon arm forearm behind the bell guard, upper arm down, close to the torso. The non-weapon hand might be up, and that's for foil only, since that is target area in epee.
[edit:2] "Well, it's in actual combat, not sports fencing." Then go by the rules of Epee.
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« Last Edit: October 30, 2008, 07:54:10 PM by Saradin »
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Foxy-Woxy The Sandwich Scout
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« Reply #82 on: October 30, 2008, 07:38:39 PM » |
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One thing. Her left arm is at an impossible angle. I see what you're aiming for, but it really looks like her arm is stretching behind her back, rather than sticking out to her left.
Otherwise, that's a really impressive effort.
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Popo
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« Reply #83 on: October 30, 2008, 08:24:54 PM » |
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I just have to say one thing real quick--Miki's a guy. I know I have a tendency to draw very effeminate men, sometimes to the point of androgyny/gender confusion, but trust me on this one. He's extremely dainty. Small waist, big eyes, pretty hair, and all the rest. Sorry for the confusion. (All the Utena guys are girly...!) Saradin: Ah! I'm really glad that you decided to respond to this one--I knew that if anyone out there would be able to give me good pointers on perspective, it would be you. I'll go back and fix the arm closest to the camera when I get a chance. I was having trouble with how I should portray his grip, so I just tried to cover it all up. (That worked to my disadvantage.) I'll see what I can do with that, and also try and elongate the forearm a bit more so it doesn't look so scrunched up. I think it'll also look better with a few shadows in there as well. As for proper stance, well... I mentioned in my description that I saw this pose in a scene from the show and really fell in love with it. I recognize that said pose is probably not at all conducive to actual fencing, but I'm still very fond of it and intend to keep it, whether it's correct or not. It's just a generic anime pose, riddled with errors, and sort of a trademark look for this particular character. (Thanks for the fencing tips, however.  ) Fox: I see what you mean, and I don't think I would have noticed if it hadn't been pointed out to me. I see what I need to do--Thanks! |
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Popo
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« Reply #84 on: October 31, 2008, 01:29:00 PM » |
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Is this... any better? :O (Never mind the elbow on the arm closest to us--I just noticed that it looks weird. I'll fix it. )  |
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Foxy-Woxy The Sandwich Scout
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« Reply #85 on: October 31, 2008, 03:01:55 PM » |
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Is this... any better? :O (Never mind the elbow on the arm closest to us--I just noticed that it looks weird. I'll fix it. ) Hmm. Unfortunately, the problem with the left arm remains unchanged. Take a minute to note the angle, and then look at his arm's position. The upper arm is sticking out way too far, which gives the appearance that it's sticking out behind his back. |
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Popo
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« Reply #86 on: October 31, 2008, 03:53:53 PM » |
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HMMM. I just tried to shorten the upper arm, and now it looks too short. I'll keep trying though. Thanks!
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Foxy-Woxy The Sandwich Scout
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« Reply #87 on: October 31, 2008, 04:05:12 PM » |
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HMMM. I just tried to shorten the upper arm, and now it looks too short. I'll keep trying though. Thanks!
His arm's length isn't the issue here. What you need to do is focus on changing the angle the arm's positioned at. This is a perspective issue. Ideally, you won't be able to see much of his upper arm at all, mostly just his left shoulder. I may need Tybalt to verify that, though...  |
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Sardine
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« Reply #88 on: October 31, 2008, 06:52:01 PM » |
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I'm going to make your piece a little messy. Congratulations on forcing me to do a draw through In order to give a more accurate critique.  First note: the unarmed weapon arm. Notice the change in the blue. That is what fox has been talking about in the last three posts. Second note: notice an acute change in the length of the upper arm on the weapon arm. Most elbows end just above the end of the ribs, above the navel. Third note: note the acute change on the perspective of the forearm. Hope this clears up the perspective kinks. If you think a cylinder looks odd, grab the nearest can, and look at it at that angle. |
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Popo
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« Reply #89 on: November 01, 2008, 07:06:11 AM » |
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Ah! I understand now. Thanks for taking the time to mark up my piece, Saradin. It really helps me out a lot! I'm gonna go run off with your suggestions now. |
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Popo
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« Reply #90 on: November 20, 2008, 12:23:46 PM » |
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My final art post. D: I finished Miki! You can find him here!My new gallery can be found here. |
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Popo
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« Reply #91 on: June 01, 2010, 07:36:41 PM » |
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Charliecane
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« Reply #92 on: August 07, 2010, 10:15:08 PM » |
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I'm just posting here to say that the guy with the sword looks kind of like the lovechild of Reinhard von Lohengramm and Siegfried Kircheis.
yes, I know I'm two years late
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Superbus will scold you if you don't read the rule and she or another admin will burn you to crisp if you break one. T is for trash.
As in Rebecca. you can read me like a book... you know I'm consider bisexual polygamy Previously known as Musashi.
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(／_^)／ ● ＼(^_＼)
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« Reply #93 on: August 08, 2010, 01:09:36 AM » |
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I'm just posting here to say that the guy with the sword looks kind of like the lovechild of Reinhard von Lohengramm and Siegfried Kircheis.
Except Miki has blue hair. While Reinhard and Siegfried's child would have orange hair using SEISEN's logic. |
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 ~~May your future be filled with happiness~~ |
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burning_phoneix
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« Reply #94 on: August 08, 2010, 05:41:05 AM » |
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Wait....Miki is a guy?!  I'm just posting here to say that the guy with the sword looks kind of like the lovechild of Reinhard von Lohengramm and Siegfried Kircheis. Am I the only one who still believes that is heterosexual bromance?  |
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 "I refuse to use Firefox because its logo is a furry raping the Earth"~Sword Saint |
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(／_^)／ ● ＼(^_＼)
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« Reply #95 on: August 08, 2010, 06:14:22 AM » |
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Wait....Miki is a guy?! Am I the only one who still believes that is heterosexual bromance? Of course. Isn't it obvious? You aren't. |
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~~May your future be filled with happiness~~ |
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Charliecane
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« Reply #96 on: August 08, 2010, 02:27:54 PM » |
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Am I the only one who still believes that is heterosexual bromance? You aren't, but it's amusing to poke fun at it once in a while. |
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Superbus will scold you if you don't read the rule and she or another admin will burn you to crisp if you break one. T is for trash.
As in Rebecca. you can read me like a book... you know I'm consider bisexual polygamy Previously known as Musashi.
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Popo
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« Reply #97 on: August 08, 2010, 02:53:27 PM » |
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Charliecane
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« Reply #98 on: August 08, 2010, 04:27:30 PM » |
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The bottom right picture is my favorite. No, I didn't bother looking at the rest. I'll do it later. |
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Superbus will scold you if you don't read the rule and she or another admin will burn you to crisp if you break one. T is for trash.
As in Rebecca. you can read me like a book... you know I'm consider bisexual polygamy Previously known as Musashi.
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(／_^)／ ● ＼(^_＼)
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« Reply #99 on: August 08, 2010, 11:42:42 PM » |
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Hey, hey, hey. Stop trying to make my homo characters go straight. D:<
Popo likes shounen-ai. No wonder Musashi...But Miki isn't gay, he's into his sister! D: These ones are cute. Poor Larry.  Also. Your pen tutorial was very helpful. I need to thank you for it. |
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« Last Edit: August 09, 2010, 01:50:08 AM by Marthur »
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~~May your future be filled with happiness~~ |
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